Category Archives: Life

Arts, Britain, Government, Life, Politics, Society

A debate on family needs is much needed

SOCIAL POLICY

OVER the past 60-years, society has witnessed multiple revolutions in the status of women, in the nature of family life, and the way the next generation is being raised. Yet, in politics, it is astonishing that the position of women, and especially that of mothers, is rarely discussed.

Some of the changes over the last six decades have been driven by deliberate Left-wing social policy and militant feminism. Some have suited business very well, as it has benefited hugely from the expansion of the female workforce and the vast reservoir of talent this has provided that they can draw on.

Some societal changes have their roots in the lingering effects of the Second World War, which placed terrible strains on so many young families and led to far more widespread marital breakdown and divorce. This caused far more women to go out to do paid work than had ever done so before.

Other changes are the result of medical and scientific innovations, from the introduction of the contraceptive pill for birth control to the development of labour-saving devices in the home.

The rapid growth of mass car ownership has made it first possible and then almost compulsory for young women to multitask as both mothers in the home and as contributors of the economy in the form of paid work.

The results have been the usual mixture of good and bad, but Conservative politicians – in particular – have tended to go rather too readily with the flow, endorsing or accepting radical changes without asking if they are beneficial to our society. So, in the UK we should welcome the intervention of Miriam Cates MP, a former biology teacher and mother of three, as a starting point for a very necessary debate.

Ms Cates, who is refreshingly willing to think aloud and to fight her corner, is rightly concerned about the pressures on women who pursue careers and motherhood together, often trying to postpone parenthood. She says the vast majority of young women do want to become mothers but that there are many reasons why they don’t have children at the time they want to.

She is correct. The relentless passage of time, in reality, greatly limits the opportunity to choose parenthood.

Despite all the pressures of liberal media, economic need, and fashion, many people – both men and women – still rather like the idea of enjoying as much traditional family life as they can reasonably arrange. Work-life balance is similarly a pressing and parallel priority.

Many would probably have more children, sooner, if they could find the time and the money. Generally, however, the historical trend is that if you have one, you cannot have the other.

Some European countries are considerably more generous to young families, through their tax and benefits systems, than we are.

Of whatever political persuasion we may be, Britain should also be moving in this direction. Other problems that arise as a consequence – of good, reliable, and affordable childcare, and of housing costs in a tough market – also require some attention.

Any future UK Government needs to offer a thoughtful and unwoke approach to social policy, rather than just continually following in the footsteps of Blairism. Changes are needed in a world where people wishing to combine careers and parenthood become the priority in national life.

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Arts, Life, Psychology

Wandering about

NOTICE AND WONDER

THERE is so much emphasis placed on achievement in life!

We all know that achievements are important if we are to grow and develop, but they shouldn’t overshadow everything else. This is why I hope readers will like this idea from Kurt Vonnegut’s 1963 literary novel “Cat’s Cradle”.

“Life is a garden,” he wrote, “not a road. We enter and exit through the same gate. Wandering, where we go matters less than what we notice.”

Perhaps the real purpose of our achievements and our wanderings is simply to provide new things to notice … and wonder about.

Mr Vonnegut’s play on words reminds us that so much is missed, even when it stares right back at us. In psychology, this is referred to as “change blindness”, a phenomenon that has been intensely investigated by researchers since the 2000s.

. Science Book inaugurated 25 February, 2023

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Arts, Health, Life, Psychology

Understanding well-being

WELLBEING

Podcast: This entry is available on audio

THE phrase, “state of well-being” is often loosely bandied about, but what does this phrase actually mean? It is a rather nebulous phrase, which many interpret as synonymous with welfare or level of happiness, state of physical or mental health or degree of satisfaction with life.

Perhaps all these factors do form part of what we mean by this term, but not necessarily so. For example, let us speculate upon Andrea Bocelli, the renowned Italian tenor who became blind at the age of twelve. Must his level of positive well-being be significantly compromised because of his physical infirmity? There is every possibility that Bocelli might enjoy an extremely high level of positive well-being despite his lack of sight, since estimation of one’s well being is a highly subjective phenomenon.

As the author Antoine de Saint-Exupéry perspicaciously implies in a 1943 story entitled, Le Petit Prince, it is what we think of ourselves that counts and determines our state of well-being. However, what we think of ourselves, for good or ill, can be greatly influenced by what others think of us:

I have no right, by anything I do or say, to demean a human being in his own eyes. What matters is not what I think of him; it is what he thinks of himself.

Objective measures of well-being

We can attempt to measure welfare or well-being in accordance with objective measures, such as where a person may be located on various scales – be they economic, social, psychological, physical or even spiritual – but none of these actually capture the reality of well-being as experienced by the individual.

Practitioners often come into contact with many people who ostensibly have no business not to enjoy high levels of positive well-being, status, good health, loving relationships, interesting careers and so much more. And yet, such people are known to suffer from depression, anger, addictions, eating disorders and anxiety, as well as other mental health afflictions. Clearly, then, objective measures alone do not provide an accurate assessment for an individual’s state of well-being.

Positive well-being is about meeting our expectations

It is generally accepted that being adequately fed, watered, housed and exercised, along with being gainfully employed and well-educated, as well as having good physical health, are all components that facilitate positive well-being, but they are far from the whole story.

Well-being is primarily concerned with the degree to which our expectations, dreams and aspirations are met, and these are totally unique to each individual. Many of our attitudes are a direct result of our “nurturing” and this, along with our own aptitudes and personality – our “nature” – mingle together to form ideals of what success looks like for each of us.

Culture influences our sense of well-being

Depending upon our cultural heritage we might favour a collective or individualistic approach to life (or maybe a combination of the two), and this will colour our estimation of personal well-being. In a strictly collectivist society, blending into the group and not drawing attention to oneself generates feelings of acceptance, belonging and comfort. Even if the price paid is conceding to a high degree of conformity to group expectations, this will still work towards affording a sense of positive well-being for the majority who have been socialised in this manner.

We are not all equally malleable in continuing to society’s conventions

There are mavericks in every society, where the personal imperative outstrips that of the social; these highly autonomous individuals buck the trend and follow their own course of action, often at their own peril. Not to follow their own star would lead to considerable inner conflict and result in a state of negative well-being. Many of this ilk find themselves “damned if they do and damned if they don’t” in subscribing to normative behaviour.

These people, by not conforming, invite society’s disapproval or, by conceding to society’s expectations, they feel that they have not been true to themselves and experience dissonance. Dissonance is a state of mental conflict when you experience contradictory emotions and beliefs. In the not-too-distant-past, working women who wished to pursue their career after having children faced this dilemma.

Individualistic society

In fiercely individualistic societies, being indistinguishable from the pack tends to promote negative well-being, since leadership, power and talent differentiate an individual from the herd, attracting kudos and admiration. Individualistic socialisation demands that we stand out from the crowd if we are to feel good about ourselves and enjoy positive well-being. This pressure can be seen in cultures that emphasise educational attainment, and prestigious institutions can foster individualism to an even higher level.

Collectivist vs. individualistic

The powerful impact of nurturing and socialisation, resulting in the inculcation of society’s expectations, mores and values, can be seen in the contrast between collectivist and individualistic societies. Public shame has a far greater negative impact on well-being in Japan, a collectivist society, than it has in contemporary Europe, which favours a more individualistic approach. One only has to look at the number of disgraced European officials who have bounced back into public life, subsequent to their humiliation and ruination. In contrast, a number of Japanese politicians and business leaders have accepted personal responsibility for their government’s or organisation’s shortcomings in the last decade, often resigning their positions. Today, in European society, people tolerate a variety of responses. Some applaud the manifestation of honour and integrity which resignation signals, while others praise the resilience of those who insist upon remaining in post.

The important thing to keep in mind is that societal attitudes are constantly changing and evolving. Many people do get stuck in a time warp and hold on to childish perceptions about themselves and feelings, such as shame, which negatively impact their well-being. It is advisable to constantly reassess your perceptions of experiences and work out if the view you are holding is in line with your current values and beliefs. Often when you go through this process you will recognise that you are carrying parental, peer or societal attitudes that are not in tune with your own moral compass, and which therefore need to be updated.

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